Monday, April 5, 2010

Dialogues Part 7

Me: Hey Voice?
Voice: Yes
Me: Can I ask you about something?
Voice: Sure...what about?
Me: Well...
Voice: Hm?
Me: It's about this love thing.
Voice: Ok. What would you like to know?
Me: ...why you love me.
Voice: I love you because I love you.
Me: But what if I...
Voice: I love you.
Me: Even if...
Voice: I love you.
Me: But what about that time I--
Voice: I love you.
Me: BUT WHY???
Voice: Because I DO.
Me: But HOW?
Voice: Because I AM.
Me: But--
Voice: quiet dear, and remember
Me: Remember?? Remember what? I don't feel good and I don't want to remember.
Voice: Then you will never be able to know.
Me: Know what?
Voice: Why and how I love you.
Me: So what do I have to do? What do I have to be?
Voice: Well, thanks for being willing to ask.
Me: *sigh*...yes okay I am really willing to know what I have to do and be, but what you're asking isn't easy.
Voice: I know.
Me: It's just...
Voice: It's just what?
Me: ...sometimes I get scared that the things you tell me are true aren't really true. I get scared that they aren't really important.
Voice: Why do you get scared?
Me: well, I think it's because I see how easily some people get it and then I think I won't ever get it.
Voice: That's silly, since you get it already!
Me: HUH?
Voice: You come to me over and over looking for love. And you know you will always find it. So why do you fear?
Me: Oh. I don't know any more.
Voice: There you go. There's love.
Me: What's love?
Voice: Not knowing.
Me: You are making me want to scream!
Voice: are making you want to scream.
Me: So what do you mean then about this not knowing?
Voice: I mean that, you must know that Love is the most important thing, since you keep looking for it.
Me: I suppose, yes. I do.
Voice: And you keep finding it, right?
Me: Yes.
Voice: Which means that it must always be here, whether you sense it or not, since every time you look for it it is here?
Me: Uh...yes.
Voice: And would you say that your eventual goal is to live with the awareness of Love at every moment so you can let the asking of these questions go and live in peace?
Me: ...yes...that would be wonderful.
Voice: So, you are acknowledging that it is possible to live in Love every day, every moment of your life?
Me: ...yes...I guess you've shown me that.
Voice: You guess?
Me: okay okay I know you've shown me that.
Voice: So how do you feel when you think of this possibility?
Me: I feel fantastic, flying, joyous, soooo healthy and beautiful and loved.
Voice: That's good, because that's who you were made to be.
Me: I know...but sometimes I think--
Voice: --let's leave what you think about this for another conversation, and finish this topic first.
Me: Okay...I know how you always like to keep me on point.
Voice: Yes. So, we've established that living in Love is your first goal, above all?
Me: Yep. Number one, top of the list, numero uno muchacha.
Voice: Good. And you acknowledge that you have the power to find love at any moment because it is always here?
Me: Yes ma'am.
Voice: Great. Now is where the not knowing comes in, so we can finish talking about that.
Me: YES let's. I would like to know about not knowing.
Voice: When we live in Love we don't know where that Love is going to take us.
Me: I know. That's what scares me! I feel like I have no control.
Voice: That's because you don't! Love is in control. And her control feels like it's not in control. You know that feeling?
Me: Yes, of course I do...kind of like a puppy who comes up and looks like it could just go to pieces with all the excitement it feels...
Voice: YES. Give me some more examples.
Me: ...or...a flower that grows in a crack in the wall. It looks like moss one day and the next it's a blooming blossom where you thought there was just graffiti.
Voice: GOOD. What else?
Me: Like that "look"...
Voice: Go on...
Me: That "look"...when I see the love in another person and they see the love in me and that current of love thingimagig happens.
Voice: Good, Love, good. You can't make that, can you.
Me: No way...I don't even know what it is. It just IS.
Voice: Good. Very good. That's how you must be, too.
Me: I see...
VOice: Do you really? Do you really and truly see that this is the answer to all of your questions and the fulfillment of all your desires?
Me: When I'm in Love, then yes, I see this.
Voice: And when you're not?
Me: ...then I don't.
Voice: Remind yourself how you feel when you're not in Love.
Me: Miserable, out of place, like I can't find the key to my beautiful home.
Voice: So why would you want to feel that way?
Me: I don't.
Voice: GOOOOD.
Me: ...I'm not quite sure what you mean still about not knowing...
Voice: Think about your examples.
Me: Ok.
Voice: About the puppy...does she know what she's here on Earth to do?
Me: No, I guess not. She's just here to be herself and let the people who see her as beautiful love her and take care of her.
Voice: YES. And does she change herself because maybe one person she goes up to doesn't like dogs?
Me: Well, hopefully not!
Voice: Ahhh...that's good! You understand that.
Me: I mean, someone could God forbid treat her badly and then she might change.
Voice: Yes...animals are like children and they need protection. But you know the secret to being an adult and being free from those things that could make the puppy change because she was treated badly.
Me: I do??
Voice: Yes, of course. It's love.
Me: Of course, yes.
Voice: You can always choose Love, because you know it's always here. A child or an animal might not always know that but you know what?
Me: What?
Voice: There is hope because as long as someone is innocent like a child or a pet they can be influenced by adults like you who ARE filled with Love and understand Love.
Me: Why do I want to cry right now...?
Voice: You want to cry because you are feeling the incredible power that Love has to bring hope in every situation, whether living beings are aware of it or not!
Me: I see...I really see!
Me: Huh? Why are you yelling at me? I never said I tried to...
Voice: Yes, you did. You want to be in control. You want to know the outcome of your life, which you cannot control when you are living in Love. It makes you uncomfortable so you try to fake Love and manipulate things around so they come out the way you think you want them to, but the whole time you are out of Love so you're feeling miserable and all you do just falls apart...and then you come to me and ask me to fix them!!!
Me: Oh.
Voice: Yes. Can you see the truth in that?
Me: Yes. I'm sorry.
Voice: No need to apologize, just do what you do and be who you are.
Me: Okay...
Voice: I love you.
Me: I love you too.
Voice: Do you understand the flower now? And that powerful feeling you sometimes feel between yourself and other people?
Me: Yes. Yes I do.
Voice: Do you understand why I love you and how?
Me: Because you have no choice?
Voice: Well...not exactly. YOU have a choice. But I, I AM LOVE so I don't have to choose.
Me: ...but you say that I am you so why am I left with all the responsibility to choose and you don't have to??
Voice: Ahh, my dear you have touched on the only difference between me and you. I am Love, AND you are Love, when you are living in Me. But when you're not, you're not.
Me: Wow. So this whole thing is much deeper than I thought it was at the beginning.
Voice: Indeed. And quite simple, do you see?
Me: Yes I see. I'm a bit in awe.
Voice: As you should be. We are talking about the most powerful force in the Universe and all there really is.
Me: Wow.
Voice: Yes, Wow.
Me: You never cease to amaze me.
Voice: Good. My deepest wish for you is that you live this feeling every moment of your life. Then you will know that you know Love.
Me: Wow, you really do love me.
Voice: I really do.
Me: I'm okay now I think.
Voice: You think?
Me: I know. I know I'm more than okay. I am loved and I am Love.
Voice: Very, very good.
Me: Thank you.
Voice: This is what I'm here for.
Me: I want to be like you!
Voice: Don't worry dear, you are being and becoming me every moment of every day.
Me: I am so grateful.
Voice: As am I.
Me: You know what I have to do today...
Voice: Yes, I know every bit of it, every day...go and do it with Love.
Voice: I'll be there with you!
Me: I know. You've taught me that. You are the BEST teacher.
Voice: Now go on.
Me: Okay...
Voice: Love.
Me: Love.

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